If she felt like you didn't respect or support her in her pursuits, she would feel like you don't care about what she wants. She may not have any complaints about you or the relationship itself. It's normal to feel the urge to try and repair the situation, but crying and begging after being dumped won't help, especially if you treated her badly in the relationship. 23K views, 352 likes, 6 loves, 22 comments, 15 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Shelley Civil & Plant Hire: Judge Judy Ex-Boyfriends and AbuseLandlord. She was really in love with me too. If she wasn't having as much sex as you wanted, it may have been because she was losing attraction towards you (check #2 above). We've all been there - everything seemed to be going great between you both and then out of nowhere, she decides to break up. HubPages is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. Yellow, black. She reached out less than one week later in regret. Matt is a painter and freelance writer. Did you guys rarely have conversations about each others' feelings? Controlling your emotions during a breakup is really important, not only for your recovery moving forward, but also for increasing your chances of winning her back. This is one of the most common reasons why I see clients getting broken up with. My girlfriend of 4 years just broke up with 2 da My Pregnant Girlfriend Broke up with me, and had an abortion behind my back. It is what it is. It's true that generally speaking, women are a bit more communicative than guys regarding what they're feeling, and when a girl doesn't feel that she's on the same page as her guy, she can begin to feel disconnected. Whatever the reason, the only way you dig your way out of this by apologizing. This isn't something you can just fix, of course. I need some outside help on this before I spiral down into depression. She decided to go home. I'm not asking you to give up on her, because you love her the same way I love my ex, but for now, the only thing you can do is to accept this is happening. And now she's probably deciding to break up . Our interests are the same and there is so much that is good and wonderful. Usually we need some weeks or even months of distance and reflection and rebuilding to be able to understand what went wrong. We had both gotten out of long relationships 3-4 months previous to hanging out with each other but being with her made me forget all about my ex. I was heartbroken because i was by his side the whole way through. Advice would be useful. From then on, you disappear. There could also have been a drop in the quality of your communication. Go out with your friends, watch a ball game or spend some time doing your favorite hobby. And even then, I'd advise against it. You will be okay - I promise. Maybe you've been really busy with work lately or made a new group of friends. He has suddenly lost interest and I dont know why? Either way, she hasn't been getting to spend as much time with you as she'd like. You would have to apologize to her, making sure you explain exactly why you lied (like if it was out of fear or jealousy, etc). It would be hard for someone to be intimate with you if they have issues dealing with your short fuse. I'm going to have to explain this one a little bit. You simply need to accept your current situation. I still love, miss and care about her so much. She sometimes has really huge mood swings due to cramps in the stomach and what not, I try to support her as best as I can. My issue: I have trouble getting over my gf. You may be more adventurous in bed than she's comfortable with. It's also important to be completely honest with yourself and her. She's making up these excuses because she doesn't want to hurt you. People don't end great relationships. I'm so confused and hurt. As a guy, it's not uncommon to feel nervous about sharing our insecurities with others. But it's likely to not be about the actual number. I don't want to mess things up by being to clingy, but I don't want to distance myself and see her slip away. The sex is wonderful and we have never tired of it. Sadly I'm in a similar position. I know exactly how you feel, you want to try your best to improve things, to tell her how much she means to youI did it, but it failed. Of course I wouldn't text as much because I knew she had school to focus on and homework etc. Did you not feel comfortable performing certain sexual acts? With the right kind of therapeutic help, you can recover from the breakup of a past relationship and have a fulfilling life on your own. If your internal story doesn't match the external reality, this will manifest itself as pain. In other words, if she has no actual complaints about you or the relationship, there's nothing to say that you can't just continue your relationship after she has fulfilled her desire to be single. She knows she has the upper hand, she's got the power because you begged her. So later that night I called her because I knew something was up. SHE CAN'T GET WHAT SHE WANTS IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU She has certain goals or desires that just can't be fulfilled while in a relationship with you. I want honest communication. Also does it matter why she broke up? Different points in life - Maybe you both just lack enough commonalities. Yet, it is always a possibility. My girlfriend of 2 years did the same thing to me, recently breaking up with me, saying that she just suddenly lost feelings for me and thinks of me more as a best friend instead of a boyfriend. I suddenly lost interest in a really sweet girl, We had an argument and then she suddenly broke up please help, We have prepared our wedding but suddenly she lost interest and broke up the relationship. Way better than this one. 2 My girlfriend broke up with me out of the blue to go back to her toxic ex. Then she text me a day later saying she could not feel positive about us and to move on and we were over. And then there's the actual waiting - you don't know how long you have to wait for her, either. Lacking support - Having each other's back and supporting your partner is an important part of a fulfilling relationship. If they leave it just means they werent for you. So no I took up no contact on Monday and am planning on keeping it for as long as I can. She says I was the perfect boyfriend and I was so good to her. If she believes you both are at different points in life, it could be the sole reason behind the breakup. Why would you choose to give your precious time (which we do not have a lot of on this earth) to someone who would up and leave you without offering an explanation? You won't suddenly stop hurting and forget about her. I badgered her and carried on until she said its over move on leave me alone. Ok let's start: Has it been at least 5 days since you guys broke up? 4. My ex girlfriend broke up with me about two months ago. You can imagine my distress when she told me "there are so many people in the world, I'm not the only one that can be out there for you". But the thing is, if there really is another guy everything kind of falls into place. Lacking security - If someone isn't feeling secure in their relationship, it's not going to go very far. Thanks ,I'm also in the very same situation you described. It was like I was reading something a woman wrote. And how it causes you to question every little thing. As guys, we're taught most of our lives to be assertive and grab what we want. If you've stagnated in your pursuits while she has continued to better herself, she has basically outgrown you. The above is part of why I cannot fathom the fact that she called off the relationship. You're going to focus on the other parts of your life so that when she's ready to stop being single, you will be there for her and ready. People end relationships for a wide variety of reasons, and even if. If your financial position deteriorated, that probably had a part to play in your breakup. Accepting the fact that your girlfriend's leaving you sucks, but the best thing you can do for yourself in this situation is to respect her decision and not contact her again. Grooming and Fashion - If you've not been taking very good care of yourself, especially compared to when both of you first started dating, it's probably playing a part. Her exact reasons for wanting to be single can vary - maybe she wants to focus on career/education, maybe she thinks it's too soon to be in a committed relationship, maybe she just hasn't been single in a long time, etc. The truth is that it is simply none of your business. Additionally, she also removed a majority of really good friends from her life without giving them explanations either. Welp, there we go. I went on my first ever date a little over a month ago with an amazing girl. This is a critical stage where break ups happen most often. I'm not a very romantic lovey girl but he pulled her out of me loving him was so easy but one night we argued very long an he said eh was tired and he broke it off . I cannot sleep because of worry, anxiety, and a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. What she says about you not being close to her, and the other stuff, is ****. She wants to be single right now, not forever. She's very likely to not know that herself, in fact. Girlfriend broke my heart 3 days agoIve never hurt this bad. The new guy provides value to her in ways that you weren't. You might be tempted to agree to something now because you don't want to lose her, but if you're not actually on the same page; you're just delaying the inevitable. By entering this site you declare Happened to me too, so confusing and feels bad really. It's just that she did. From reading your post you act like a chick. VERY LONG: My girlfriend broke up with me and i feel fkn confused. This broke my heart to hear since I'm pretty sure that by saying that, she also means the same for her. Unless she was completely mistaken about her desires, she's not going to suddenly miss you so much that she changes her mind about being single. As long as we have ppl to talk to we're gonna make it bro. Calmly tell her you're unhappy and disappointed with her decision, but that you accept it. You won't suddenly win her back by impressing her with your deductive skills. You're still going to be hurting. If you're willing to compromise on some of your values and prioritize your ex's more, then that's the obvious first step. She's two cups of coffee in, typing 140 miles per hour on Slack, scheduling appointments, and applying make-up as . I am really confused about what is going on and I can't seem to get a real explanation out of her other than she suddenly lost all feelings and says she loves me but is not in love with me. We met up it went great. The world is a shaky place, and this past year has been quite remarkable. Without intimacy, no romantic relationship will ever go far. I went through this situation myself and I know exactly how it feels. Then women will stick around. Chalk it up to experience and move on . For her to decide to leave you for this other guy, it also means that this other guy provides more value than you. At some point in the session, I eventually bring up the fact that there is a reason for her breaking up with them. Girlfriend called it quits out of nowhere Thursday. Contrary to what you think, pulling off has a better chance of making her come back than to be clingy/begging/there for her. Calmly tell her you're unhappy and disappointed with her decision, but that you accept it. The day before the break up she was sleeping over at my place. I don't know what to do anymore and I just feel completely lost. It was all going so well suddenly she broke up, and I'm so confused. We're starting with the big one. She has been very stressed because of classes and has occasional bad days. People aren't mindreaders. While things may feel helpless and bleak, life hasn't actually stopped. You don't need to understand everything right now. You wouldn't want to date a girl who still wanted her ex back right? Use this time apart from her to focus your 100% on this. When it comes to getting dumped by a girl, the true reason lurking behind it all is ATTRACTION. No one in the world would leave their second half because they miss him/her. It's going to take a while. But can It be that this breakup is because she has gone back to him? We are scheduled to go to a concert in a couple of weeks, so I will see her then. Yeah I know that feeling.I don't be nice to everyone I because in today's world we're dealing with physical and spiritual.Let God direct your path.If you treated ur former girl like diamonds and gold then she don't deserve you man.Dont worry because looks fade and personality stays. If you never complimented her or acknowledged her accomplishments, she probably felt like you didn't care about her success. Go hang out with your friends after a breakup, to keep yourself occupied. Understanding why she broke up with you isn't suddenly going to fix everything. it doesnt sound like a break up at all. NOTE: This site requires you to enable JavaScript. She has always been so loving and caring, always tells me how much she loves me, has asked me when I am going to marry her, mentions kids in our future in conversations, etc (and she knows that I want to marry her when our living situations can allow it). Meaning, have one last conversation with your boyfriend and put the phone down. ), she is fearful of losing my friendship. She broke up with you. My best guy friend suddenly blocked me from texting him. Going 'no contact' after a breakup is an effective way to win your ex back, but you should use this strategy for personal growth, not out of hope that she'll reach out to you. It would be better than this confusion, which in the long run I believe will hurt me even more. All along she led me to believe that it was school that was taking its toll on her physically and emotionally. This is usually more important to women, and often why so many men don't understand it well. Were you calling or texting fewer times than before? My friends told me the same, if she broke up with me on skype and didn't even hear me out on my side of everything, she's not even worth my time, but I think that fear was controlling her actions. That's your priority now. Hi I read this and I like to know how it ended up? Weight Issues - Have you gained a lot of weight since you guys have been dating? She told me once that she wants the relationship to be like when we first met, but I tried to explain that no relationship keeps being as they were when lovers just got together.. She said she wanted to be friends and I said I can't because I'd want to touch her and hold her. Was planning on relocating with me when I relocate for my career in a few months by going to grad school in that city. Honesty to yourself. Even if you make the necessary changes ASAP, she's not going to suddenly think you've lost a few years. My heart is breaking, but I find at least some comfort knowing that many others have and are going through what I am going through right. You may have started spending more time and attention on other people or pursuits. </p><p>This action-packed Cannibal Mutant Killers In The Woods flick has a slick look that belies its surprising brutality, courtesy of mostly practical effects by Stan Winston. Obviously all of the twists and turns broke my heart so I bombarded her again and to no prevail . My bf of a year broke up with me about a week and a half ago said he lost interest because we argued and took a few breaks. But through all her problems with her friends and family as well as school, I have been there for her, giving her love and the affection she needs in a time like this. But if two people are truly incompatible, it can be really hard to get around it. Im so glad that Im not with her and thank my lucky stars I didnt move in with her or marry her. I realized how out of balance our relationship was. Are you bad at keeping promises? Two days on she rang me and said she would pick me up n go for tea. There has to be something else going on here. Unforgivable Incident - Did you say something hurtful to her? Naturally, I implored her "please, let's work on this together", but she has obviously already made up her mind and it really hurts that she did so without letting me in on the decision. A healthy balance is always crucial, though. I have been following this site for quite some time ever since my gf broke up with me last month. If she found someone else, that's just one part of it. But it feels like a contradiction! All I can do now is try to push her out of my life and hope that the next person I meet is mentally stable haha. Apple / Adrian please stay with one name, thank you. Actually, flirting with girls is a very good way to gain some confidence back. Or maybe things haven't changed at all. Maybe you picked a fight with her best friend? Im so much happier in my life. Do not contact her again after that, unless of course you have children together and have no choice, or if you need to make arrangements to exchange belongings. What can I do.. I know it's hard so has been for me. Send her a quick email saying you're fine with it, you accept the breakup, you think it's best for both of you, good bye (I know it's the total opposite of how you feel now). You will have to slowly build up trust even if she forgives you. She is 26, working and finished with college and I am 24, not working (because I wan. And when we were together the night before we enjoyed ourselves like we use to. Shes probably speaking to someone else, thats 99% of what happens. I feel alone, miserable, sad and hopeless, haven't really been able to gather the motivation to do anything. But I am not okay, I am a wreck. 5. 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